When You’re Ready For Change

Kathy Gates, Professional Life Coach

www.reallifecoach.com

Change doesn’t usually come easy.  You know you want something different, but you get stuck in uncertainty or frustration with lack of results. But if you remember that it’s a step by step process, and you have the power of choice and the power of action, you’ll be ready to open the doors to your future.   

Step 1.  Identify it 

In the U.S., the southern expression for that is “Name it and Claim it”.  Be realistic.  Be specific.  Why is ‘specific’ important?  Because “I want a job that includes regular traveling” could mean anything from being a nanny for Tom Cruise’s kids to flying a plane for FedEx.  Narrow it down.   

Step 2.  Visualize it 

A lot of people disregard this step, but visualizing has several important elements.  (1) It helps you create a clear picture of what you want.  (2) It helps you see yourself actually performing the activity, similar to a dry-run, and therefore you can become comfortable with it.  (3) It helps you ask questions in a safe setting, look at things objectively, make adjustments, and piece together a plan that you feel good about and that works for you.   

Step 3.  Believe it 

This goes hand in hand with visualizing it, because as you visualize yourself achieving the goal, you are better able to believe that you can accomplish it.  Once you really believe in your own personal ability to achieve it, this affects the choices you make, the effort you put into it, and how you handle the inevitable obstacles.  Just simply believing in yourself -- having confidence that you can accomplish what you set out to accomplish -- will take you a long long way towards your goal.   

Step 4.  Practice it 

Very few things come naturally.   If you sit around and wait on a great job, or a cleaner house, or a better relationship, you’ll always be waiting.  Instead, you can make it happen by practicing and preparing for what you want.  Want to ski downhill at 60 mph without breaking your bones?  Better practice!  Want to stop running late all the time?  Better start practicing!  Want to be more confident?  Practice it!   

Step 5.  Act as-if 

This is part of the law of attraction.  You attract back to you what you put out there.  The Bible says, “as a man thinketh, so he is”.  Translation:  What you think, you do.  You can spend all day thinking about how pitiful things are.  Or you can decide to spend all day thinking what you can do about it.  Act as-if you had options.  Act as-if you care what your future will be.  Act as-if you can make it happen.   

Step 6.  Ask for it 

Sounds simple enough.  Ask for what you need to help you accomplish your goal.  Need support?  Need ideas?  Need an expert?  Ask for it.  Ask kindly, ask politely, ask clearly, ask the right person.  Don’t insist, just ask.  Be willing to reciprocate.  But if a person can’t or won’t give you what you need, ask someone else.   

Step 7.  Expect It 

Self fulfilling prophecy is a phenomenon by which your expectation of what can or will happen causes you to behave in particular ways.  Therefore, it can even *cause* the expected event to occur.  If you think “I can’t do it”, then you won’t set into motion the actions that could cause you to achieve it.  If you think “I’m too old”, then you won’t put in the extra work it might take to achieve it.  Instead, expect the best and say “I can have nice things, IF_______”,  and fill in the blank with the specific actions that would create the desired result.  Be realistic, but expect that you can have what you want in your life.

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